Saturday, December 06, 2008

The Weekly Rewind

Forgetting the fact that last week’s ‘Rewind’ was lost somewhere among the “tubes”, we at TBWA are thrilled that January 20, 2009 is getting closer with each passing day.

It the world goes all “Groundhog Day” on me, I’m gonna plotz.

The Weekly Rewind starts… right now!

Applaud: to President-elect Obama’s continued mastery of the presidential transition. Grumble all you want about his choices (despite the fact we don’t know how they will act under Obama), complain about PE Obama not ‘doing enough’ for the country (ignoring the clear fact that he’s not yet president), and amaze at the swiftness he’s utilizing in stocking his cabinet and his administration.

Heckle: to the devastating news from the Labor Department this week that reported that 533,000 jobs were lost last month (the largest such decline since 1974) while unemployment surged to 6.7%. (And yet the Bush(whacked) Administration continues to act like the lamest duck ever and does absolutely nothing… thanks for the leadership Dubya; ya putz)

Applaud: to putting one’s foot securely in one’s mouth. Regarding the economic meltdown, “President” Bush said this week; “I think when the history of this period is written, people will realize a lot of the decisions that were made on Wall Street took place over a decade or so, before I arrived.” (A decade ago? Wait a minute, I’m doing math in my head… carry the two… that would be 1990… that would be the presidency of George H.W. Bush… or Papa as Dubya calls him. Oops…)

Heckle: that it took the White House and some conservative economists this long to realize what we’ve been saying for days weeks months; ‘it’s a recession stupid!’

Applaud: to outstanding approval ratings for President-elect Obama. While some continue to mope and grope, most Americans – those that realize Obama isn’t president yet – approve of the job he’s doing, to the tune of 67%. Hopefully this continues…

Heckle: to the continued raping and pillaging of the environment under the Bush(whacked) Administration. Earlier this week the Department of the Interior Department unveiled a new rule that challenges the authority of Congress to prevent mining planned on public lands who, had had “emergency power” to stop mineral development. No more as Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne has “ignored that Congressional directive” by saying it was “procedurally flawed.” (The animosity this administration has for the environment is bone-chilling… makes you think that Lame Duck “President” Bush was mistreated in his life by nature…)

Applaud: to the news that President-elect Obama is considering a stimulus package when he takes office that would see a heavy dose of spending on environmentally friendly projects aimed at creating “green-collar jobs” while also saving energy. 1/20/09 can not come soon enough…

Heckle: to Attorney General Michael Mukasey for saying this week that he sees “no reason for prosecutions or for pardons” for any people that gave legal advice on the Bush administration’s terrorism policies, saying there was “absolutely no evidence” that legal opinions on surveillance or interrogation policy were issued for any reason “other than to protect the security of the country.”

Applaud: to Congressmen John Conyers (D-MI) and Jerrold Nadler (D-NY) for having the balls to call Attorney General Michael Mukasey onto the carpet to clarify his inane statements mentioned above. The two representatives said they were “troubled” by breadth of the statement… (And the attempts to protect Bush and his merry band of cronies begins…)

Heckle: to inane proposals whose only purpose seem to be keeping her face in the news. Alaskan Gov. she-who-must-not-be-named unveiled her “health care proposals” in order to “improve Alaska’s health and education.” The initiatives include an emphasis on… are you ready? Outdoor activity. Said you-know-who; “With amazing outdoor activities in fresh clean air and consumption of healthy clean protein in the form of wild game and Alaska’s sea food. We got berries, we’ve got Alaskan-grown produce and those things need to be promoted.” (What? This is considered a healthcare proposal? Telling people to go outside?? Way to tax your creativity and thought process there Governor…)

Applaud: that theMore » Blackwater Worldwide guards that shot and killed 17 Baghdad civilians in 2007 are facing a mandatory 30-year prison sentence.

Heckle: to SCOTUS Justice Clarence “Silent” Thomas. After the petition to hear a case that challenges President-elect Obama’s right to be president based on his citizenship at birth was denied by Justice David Souter, Thomas picked up the petition to hear the lawsuit and referred it to the full court, who then decided to distribute the case for the judges’ conference… (again, trying to beat Mr. Obama in the courtroom because you couldn’t beat him a the ballot box only shows your desperation, your wretchedness, and your abject stupidity. This has been disproven how many times? And for it to reach SCOTUS is sad and pathetic. But not AS sad and pathetic as Justice Thomas’ attempt to act as the petitioner’s muscle. Question; if SCOTUS does hear the case and finds against the petitioner, will that end this charade of justice? I doubt it…)

Applaud: to Virginia businessman Earl Stafford for paying $1 million to provide hundreds of poverty-stricken, terminally ill, wounded men and women in uniform, an inauguration party complete with food, drinks, formal wear and a heated viewing stand from whence to watch the parade… I would write more, but I have something in my eye…

Heckle: to news that should not only send a shiver up everyone’s spine but should also give everyone nightmares, it seems as though we haven’t seen the last of a political Bush. Former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush told Politico that he is “considering” a run for the Senate being given up by Mel Martinez in 2010. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Applaud: to the silencing of a conservative hero. Fifty four years ago this week (December 2nd, 1954 to be exact), the US Senate voted 67-22 to condemn Sen. Joseph McCarthy for “conduct that tends to bring the Senate into dishonor and disrepute.” PWNED… big time!

Heckle: to the administration’s disdain for unions. Lame duck President Bush signed an executive order this week that prohibits approximately 8,600 federal employees from joining a union because “they are engaged in intelligence gathering, investigations and other national security work.” Seriously? That’s your reasoning for not allowing them to join a union? Talk about another abuse of the office of the president in the waning days of a sad and pathetic administration.

Applaud: to ANOTHER anniversary worthy of hearty applauds. Fifty-three years ago this week (December 1, 1955), black seamstress Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat to a white man on a Montgomery, Alabama bus. Her arrest and the ensuing bus system boycott became a rallying point for the civil rights movement… God bless you Ms. Parks.

Heckle: to the news that a new report from the Energy Information Administration bears; that U.S. greenhouse gas emissions in 2007 were 1.4 percent above the 2006 total….

Applaud: that House leader Nancy Pelosi is actually doing something and hopes to have an economic recovery bill all ready for President-elect Obama's signature on January 20th… let’s hope she actually does what she says.

Heckle: to Texas judge Manuel Banales for dismissing indictments brought against Vice President Dick Cheney and former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. Color me NOT surprised…

Applaud: Applaud: to republican Texas Rep. Louie Gohmert for having the audacity to suggest a two month tax moratorium that would allow American workers to keep all of their wages… (While I highly doubt the validity of such a concept, having someone in DC actually address the problem with some kind of a solution, regardless of how impossible it might be, is refreshing… thanks Mr. Gohmert)

Heckle: to even more bad economic news. The new annual report from the National Center for Public Policy and Higher Education reports that the rising cost of college will “threaten to put higher education out of reach for most Americans” as tuition and fees increased “439% from 1982 to 2007.” (Nice hole this administration has put us in, isn’t it?)

Applaud: that D.C. bars may be open 24/7 for the inauguration… I’d say more, but I’m already seeing two keyboards right now… damn absinthe.

Heckle: to THE most pathetic EPA EVER. Earlier this week the White House approved a regulation that will make it easier for coal companies to dump rock and dirt from mountaintop mining operations into nearby streams and valleys,” which EPA Administrator Stephen Johnson says would “protect fish, wildlife and streams.” More »(Explain to me, to everyone actually, how tossing rock and dirt into streams help fish, wildlife and streams? Anyone? Hellooooo??)

And now, our conservative Tool of the Week. This week we pay homage to conservative putz Robert Novak.

During a recent interview with the National Ledger, Novak was asked if he would reveal Valerie Plame Wilson’s secret CIA identity again, and he said; I’d go full speed ahead because of the hateful and beastly way in which my left-wing critics in the press and Congress tried to make a political affair out of it and tried to ruin me. My response now is this: The hell with you. They didn’t ruin me. I have my faith, my family, and a good life. A lot of people love me — or like me. So they failed. I would do the same thing over again because I don’t think I hurt Valerie Plame whatsoever.” Wow… he would leak it again because Liberals tried to “ruin” him – nothing like being petty – and the leaking didn’t “hurt” her “whatsoever.” First, yes it DID hurt her as, after her identity was leaked, she no longer had a career as a covert CIA agent. Second, leaking a cover operatives identity could very well put her family in peril. Third, the leaking had national security implications Plame’s CIA job was to stop Iran from acquiring nuclear weapons, and when her name was leaked and she left the post, CIA officers found it hard to recruit sources for fear of having their identities leaked…

We all know Novak leaked the identity of Valerie Plame as some mis-guided attempt to get back at her husband, Joe Wilson… but the fact he shows absolutely no regret or deference to the leak, shows he truly IS a putz who puts himself and the republican party ahead of other people’s lives and national security. And because of that Novak is our conservative tool… of the week.

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