The clock is ticking…

Following Sen. Barack Obama's ascension to the needed number of delegates to ensure the Democratic nomination, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV), House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, (D-CA), Democratic Governors Association Chairman Joe Manchin and DNC Chairman Howard Dean have issued a statement;

"We have come to the end of an exciting primary and caucus process - the voters have spoken. As the Democratic leaders of the Senate, House of Representatives, the Governors and the Democratic National Committee we commend all of the participants of the 2008 primary process, especially Senators Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, for making this such a transformational election.

Because of the enthusiasm our candidates have inspired, our party has brought record numbers of voters to the polls, gained millions of newly registered Democrats and now has advantages in states many thought were difficult to win. We are grateful to the millions of Independents and Republicans who have crossed over to vote for a Democratic candidate for president.

Democrats must now turn our full attention to the general election. To that end, we are urging all remaining uncommitted super delegates to make their decisions known by Friday of this week so that our party can stand united and begin our march toward reversing the eight years of failed Bush/McCain policies that have weakened our country.

We once again congratulate all of the candidates for their leadership and dedication to providing this country with a new direction. We look forward to working with them and with all Democrats to win the White House, congressional seats and state capitals so we can deliver the change the American people deserve and demand.”

There you have it… if you’re a super-delegate, you have until Friday.

Otherwise the DNC will be sending Vito and Bruno over to ‘help’ you make your decision…

Sure they will

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) said today that the House will vote on legislation that would spend $50 billion on the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan as early as Friday… but with a caveat that would require “President” Bush to start bringing troops home.

Riiiight…

The bill would not only set a requirement to make troop withdrawals begin immediately, it would also ensure that Marines and soldiers spend an amount of time at home equal to their time in combat and would set a goal that combat ends by December 2008… even though “major combat operations” ended a long, long time ago… but let’s not nitpick right now…

The aggressive bill would also require the government to rely on the Army field manual when conducting interrogations… which doesn’t mention waterboarding, anywhere.

Uh-huh… seems to me we’ve heard this before… and absolutely nothing came of it… what makes this any more different?

Sure, a new CNN poll finds that support for the war has plunged to 31% with a staggeringly high 68 % opposing it… but why should we believe that the Democrats have suddenly grown a set and are doing something about it?



I’ll believe it when I see it…

The Weekly Rewind

Short week, short rewind… enjoy:

Applaud: to Joe Klein. (Yes, you read that right, we’re applauding Joe Klein) It seems as though the comprehension of just how big a mess Bush has made things has reached his brain. In the coming issue of Time magazine, he concludes with a statement that is making some wonder if he is hinting that “President” Bush ought to be impeached. He claims, in referring to the president, that he has “tried to be respectful of the man and the office” but now he recognizes that the “defining sins” of his administration “are congenital: they’re part of his personality. They’re not likely to change. And it is increasingly difficult to imagine yet another two years of slow bleed with a leader so clearly unfit to lead.” (Welcome to the club Joe, we’ve got jackets…)

Heckle: to conservative pundits that have been piling on Madame Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) for covering her head with a scarf while in Syria this past week. Uh, excuse me… I seem to have recollections of Laura Bush AND Secretary of State Condi Rice doing the same thing so, rather than take the high road I’ll just say this: STFU.

Applaud: to once again showing that she has bigger balls than the “rich white men” in the White House. After numerous conservative pundits and the president attacked her trip to Syria and claimed she delivered the wrong message to Syria from Israel, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) is asking, nee, begging the White House to prove it… and oddly enough, the White House hasn’t said a damn thing yet… I wonder why??? It is so hard to express sarcasm in the written form…

Heckle: to, as always, “President” Bush as he’s decided to once again flip-off the Constitution and appointed three officials that wouldn’t have been approved by the Senate so he decided to take the cowards way out and once again did what he wanted and ignored little things like process and law… 2009 can NOT come fast enough…

Applaud: to the release of the British sailors, which, according to a lot of policy experts, was aided by the Bush(whacked) Administration NOT helping. That says a lot about our standing in the world, doesn’t it?

Heckle: to AG Alberto Gonzales. Why? Two words: Attorney. Gate. Even while another member of his staff takes the fall resigns, he’s practicing his testimony while the Senate threatens subpoenas. (again, as I’ve said before, how much longer can Bush keep this albatross around his neck until he gets rid of him?)

Applaud: to more facts & records coming to light that show (surprise, surprise) Iraq and Saddam Hussein’s regime was “not directly cooperating with al-Qaeda” before the US-led invasion… despite the Bush(whacked) Administration’s insistence that it was… (Color me NOT surprised)

Heckle: to Sen. John McCain (R-AZ). We at TBWA have, in the past, voiced our support and backing for the former POW… but now he seems to have turned into a gop version of John Kerry; flip-flopping to appease the audience he’s talking to. After a disastrous fundraising quarter, he was further criticized for taking a photo-op “stroll” through a Baghdad neighborhood that subsequently blew up in his face… now after all that, word has leaked that next week he will try to turn his campaign around by suggesting that the war in Iraq is winnable. (You sometimes have to wonder just how much he wants to be president…)

Heckle: to messing with tradition (again). “President” Bush didn’t throw out a first pitch this baseball season, making it the second time in as many years that he didn’t. His people said he was too busy, people with a brain say he didn’t want to get booed… who do you think is right?

This week’s WingNut Tool of the Week: Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich (D-GA). For putting his foot into his mouth about Spanish being the ‘language of the ghetto’ than, when trying to back-peddle in a panic, trying to say he was referring to Hebrew… wait, what?

And the week that was in the 2008 Presidential election. As mentioned earlier this week, First Quarter fundraising numbers were released and the Dems kicked butt… let’s hope they can keep it up. On the left: Obama moved to a larger campaign headquarters… Clinton got some R&R… Edwards announced he won’t be attending the Fox “News”/CBC debate… Richardson announced that he will co-head a private bipartisan delegation to North Korea next week… Biden and Dodd kept relatively quiet this week after their relatively poor first quarter fundraising results. On the right: McCain screwed up (again)… Romney tried to act more macho than he is (again)… Thompson is threatening talking about running (again)… Giuliani is severing ties with his business… Brownback was to participate in the Annual Statewide Iowa Prayer Breakfast and… well, that was really it for him…

Take ‘em as you will…

The Weekly Rewind

Friday… time for, well… you know. . Relax… and enjoy!

Applaud: to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA), who told “President” Bush to “calm down” earlier this week after Bush threatened to take his ball and go home crying to momma renewed his threat to veto legislation that would set a time line for withdrawal from Iraq. Said Pelosi: “Calm down with the threats. There is a new Congress in town. We respect your constitutional role; we want you to respect ours. This war must end. The American people have lost faith in the President’s conduct of the war. Let’s see how we can work together. This war is diminishing the strength of our military, not honoring our commitment to our veterans, and not holding the Iraqi government accountable.” (Well said Madam Speaker. Democrats, trying to raise the bar despite Bush setting it so damn low. He acts like a spoiled brat – which he is – and the Dems try to act like adults. This should end well…)

Heckle: to Karl Rove. Usually it would be just on general principles alone, but he’s been working under the radar the last few weeks and is driving a “bold, behind-the-scenes” push to ensure that “President” Bush will achieve at least one crucial policy victory in the last two years of his presidency; immigration reform. Under the plan that began to circulate around Capitol Hill Thursday, undocumented workers could apply for three-year work visas, which would cost $3,500 each time, the undocumented workers would have legal status with the visas, but in order to get a green card, they would have to return to their home country, apply at a U.S. embassy or consulate to re-enter legally and then pay a $10,000 fine… (I am split on the immigration issue, but I can say that these monetary amounts are obscenely high…

Applaud: to the American people. 59% of Americans want their congressional representative to support a withdrawal of U.S. forces from Iraq by August 2008, with a scant 33% percent opposing…(That number is almost as dismal as the incredibly low – and seemingly idiotic – 36% that believe the escalation plan will work…)

Heckle: to even less time at home and a more-strained military. Air Force Gen. Lance Smith said earlier this week that if “President” Bush’s escalation goes beyond this summer, there would be a “high probability” that many Army units would have less than a year at home between combat rotations, further constricting the already limited time to train and the chance to “reconnect with families.” (Once again, the party that supposedly cares about the military shows the exact opposite…

Applaud: to the House of Representatives who unanimously voted to “improve the care of wounded soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan,” by adding caseworkers and counselors to the military’s medical system.(About time…)

Heckle: to spin gone awry. This past Monday, on “Bill Bennett’s Morning in America” radio show, Senator John McCain (R-AZ) claimed that the U.S. “is beginning to succeed” in Iraq and said that “there are neighborhoods in Baghdad where you and I could walk through…today.” This past week has seen two truck bombs go off that killed at least 85 people in Tal Afar, along with a group of gunmen, a group that included Shiite policemen, began going door-to-door and assassinated 70 Sunnis… and did we mention the insurgent attacks on the Green Zone have increased recently, with attacks “on six of the past seven days.” A State Department official then noted, “There are increasing attacks on the [U.S.] embassy.” (But things are getting better…)

Applaud: to telling it like it is. Retired General Barry McCaffrey wrote in an assessment on the situation in Iraq, based on a recent round of meetings there with Gen. David H. Petraeus and 16 other senior U.S. commanders that the Iraqi population “is in despair,” while life in many of the urban areas is “desperate.” (But according to McCain, Iraq is getting better…)

Heckle: to the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. It was revealed this past week that they are maneuvering to fundamentally weaken the Endangered Species Act. The proposed changes include limiting the number of species that can be protected (Stupid Idea #1), it would “curtail preserved acres of wildlife habitat (Stupid Idea #2), and would “dilute legal barriers that protect habitat from sprawl, logging or mining.” (Stupid Idea #3) Add to that the fact that Interior Department inspector general is now reporting that a senior Bush political appointee, Julie MacDonald, repeatedly altered scientific field reports “to minimize protections for imperiled species.” (Well… at least we know now that this administration will never use the motto; ‘Friend of the Environment.’ Thankfully though, when word of these actions and plans leaked, it lead to an:)

Applaud: to a gaggle of Senators who vowed, after environmental groups leaked the Interior Department’s secret plan to “gut” the Endangered Species Act, to block the proposed changes through appropriations legislation.

Heckle: to this news: a pair of aircraft carriers, backed by warplanes, took up position off the coast of Iran, bringing together two strike groups of U.S. warships and more than 100 U.S. warplanes in order to conduct simulated air warfare in the crowded Gulf shipping lanes. This is the largest demonstration of force in the Persian Gulf since the 2003 invasion of Iraq… (Wait… what? Oh shit…)

Applaud: to refusing to be thrown under the bus. Sensing that he was about to go the way of Scooter Libby, former Chief of Staff for Attorney General Alberto Gonzales is apparently refusing to play the pats and, while in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee yesterday offered testimony that did not disappoint, telling the committee that AG Gonzales and Harriet Miers approved the firings of eight federal prosecutors. Said Sampson; “I and others made staff recommendations but they were approved and signed off on by the principals.” (The “principles” would be Gonzales and Miers, btw) When asked a question by Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse (D-RI), Sampson rejected Gonzales’ theory that the dismissals were ordered by young or inexperienced Justice Department officials, saying; “The decision makers in this case were the attorney general and the counsel to the president.” (In other words, Alberto Gonzales is a big ol' liar… granted, that’s not really news to most of us, but it’s still enjoyable to read in print, isn’t it… and also makes one ask just how long Bush can keep this albatross around his neck…()

Heckle: to cockfighting (no smart-ass comments Scott…), or rather to a unfathomable attempt to keep it legal. Senator Tom Coburn (R-OK) is holding up a very popular and very bipartisan bill that would crack down on cockfighting… a bill that was expected to pass easily in the Senate yesterday. House bill co-sponsor Earl Blumenauer (D-OR) said that Coburn’s hold “testifies to the powers of these shadowy forces” that allow this “illegal and barbaric” concept continue. (This one just boggles the mind. Maybe Sen. Coburn has another type of cockfighting in mind and NOT the ones with chickens. Sorry, couldn’t resist)

Applaud: to columnist Bob Novak (wait – did I just write that??). He wrote this past week that “With nearly two years remaining in his presidency, George W. Bush is alone. In half a century, I have not seen a president so isolated from his own party in Congress. The saving grace that some Republicans find in the dispute over U.S. attorneys is that, at least temporarily, it draws attention away from debate over an unpopular war.” (I’m not sure how to feel right now… am I smug in my opinion that Bush is losing his grip on his own party or scared that I agree with Bob Novak?? Help me please…)

Heckle: to losing more allies. Remember how I wrote that King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia had canceled a dinner with the White House? Well, it might have something to do with King Abdullah’s recent declaration that the U.S. is “illegitimately” occupying Iraq… which left the White House, a tad “surprised.” White House spokesman Dana Perino responded that “it is not accurate to say that the United States is occupying Iraq.” (What would you call it then Dana?)

Applaud: to, once again, the American people. 48% of Americans believe that the fired U.S. attorneys were fired because they “refused to be pressured by politics”… with a scant 22% believe that the Bush administration dismissed them “for proper reasons.” To add to your enjoyment, 55% of those polled also believe Bush is refusing to allow top aide Karl “President” Rove and other White House aides to testify under oath “because he’s trying to cover up the reasons for the firings” and not, as he repeatedly has said, because he “wants to preserve the Constitution’s separation of powers…” (Game over man… game over…)

Heckle: to the question of whether the Justice Department and the White House worked together to mislead Congress in AttorneyGate. (I vote ‘yes’)

Applaud: to not buying it. House Minority Leader John Boehner was booed earlier this week by members attending the AFL-CIO’s Building & Construction Trades Department’s legislative forum for saying the United States needs to fight the war in Iraq or face terror attacks at home. “Who doesn’t believe that if we just pull out of Iraq and come home that the terrorists won’t follow us here and we’ll be fighting them on the streets of America?” (Well… apparently most in the crowd don’t believe that ridiculous reason Mr. Boner… get a clue)

This week’s Wing-Nut Tool of the Week is: Rush Limbaugh. Essentially, Limbaugh said this week that Bush shouldn’t fire Gonzales, despite the fact he’s incompetent, because winning elections is much more important. Said Limbaugh: “I’m at a loss to understand why it is that even some people on our side and the conservative media think throwing Gonzales away is going to stop this. Now, they’ll say, “Well, that’s not what we’re trying to do. We want competence. We are conservatives, and we have high values, and high standards.” This is a battle going on here. There’s an election that’s going to hinge on stuff like this, and everybody the administration throws overboard is a tantamount admission to people that pay scant attention to politics there’s all kinds of corruption going on in there.” The man Al Franken likes to call a ‘Big Fat Idiot’ went on to say “USA Today’s got a poll: ‘Do you think something’s wrong about the firing of eight US attorneys?’ 72% said yes. 72% of the American people, a bunch of blithering idiots who have no idea what they’re talking about, but yet they voted, so these polls matter.” (Do I even need to say it? Ok, I will; What. A. Tool.)

And finally… the week that was in the 2008 Preznit race. On the left; Edwards told people not to vote for him because of sympathy or compassion for his wife’s cancer & is enjoying his status as the most wired-in candidate… Clinton tried to lay a smackdown on McCain & enjoyed a lengthened lead in Pennsylvania … Obama received an endorsement from George Clooney (so?) & chatted it up with CNN’s Wolf Blitzer. On the right: Romney threw out some possible VP names (including Jeb Bush – EVERYONE PANIC!!!!)… Giuliani says he would want his (3^rd) wife Judith to sit-in on Cabinet meetings should he become President & showed that he can flip-flop with the best of them… McCain had to defend himself from accusations that he almost left the republican party & tried to persuade people that the Iraq war is changing… and a newcomer to the bunch, with Rep. Tom Tancredo (R-CO) set to announce his bid for president on Monday in Iowa (I join everyone when I say; ‘Who?’)

And we all know that 2008 may see us elect the first female or first minority president, but have you considered this earth-shattering question from heavyweight Fox “News”: Are we ready for our first bald president in modern times? (That’s some damn-find reporting there Fox… don’t tax your “journalistic” abilities TOO much… give me strength )

Take ‘em as you will…

Guilty

If you've been living under a rock for the last 24 hours or so, you probably don't know that Scooter Libby was found guilty on four of five counts in his trial of outing CIA agent, Valerie Wilson, and faces a maximum sentence of 25 years in prison and a fine of $1 million with a presentencing report hearing scheduled for June 5.

Naturally, Libby's attorneys are vowing to either seek a new trial, or, failing that, appeal ing the jury's verdict.

The breakdown of counts:

Count 1 (Obstruction): GUILTY
Count 2 (Perjury): GUILTY
Count 3 (False Statement): NOT GUILTY
Count 4 (Perjury): GUILTY
Count 5 (Perjury): GUILTY

This is a major strike at the entire Bush(whacked) Administration... a point that was eloquently brought home by House Speaker, NancyPelosi (D-CA);

"Today's guilty verdicts are not solely about the acts of one individual. This trial provided a troubling picture of the inner workings of the Bush Administration. The testimony unmistakably revealed – at the highest levels of the Bush Administration – a callous disregard in handling sensitive national security information and a disposition to smear critics of the war in Iraq."

Well said, Madame Speaker.

Is Special Counsel Patrick Fitzgerald finished with his investigations? Will the investigation go deeper?

These are questions I am sure will be answered in the days and weeks to come, so stay tuned.

And, this being the United States where a juror on a massive trial such as this can become a 15-minute celebrity, we already have heard from one of the jurors.

While all of the jurors in the trial were certain of Libby's guilt, they also had a little sympathy for him as well because most, if not all, saw him as the "fall guy."

After the verdict, juror Denis Collins told reporters, “It was said a number of times, ‘What are we doing with this guy here? Where’s [Karl] Rove … where are these other guys?‘”

Interesting question there Denis... where are the others?

As always... stay tuned.

The Weekly Rewind

It’s that time again… Friday… and you no what that means…

No, not the early bird special at the Sizzler…

It’s time for The Weekly Rewind.

It’s been an interesting week, with rhetoric debate about the Iraq escalation plan, an attempt to get bailed out of another war, and so much crap about Anna Nicole Smith that every time I hear the latest item about her, I die a little inside…

Here we go…

Applaud: to defections. More and more republicans are coming down in favor of the Democrat-led escalation resolution, and not all of them are in danger of being unseated.. meaning that some of them are, ohmhgod, voting their conscience… quick, call Hell to see if it’s frozen over…

Heckle: to utter, unbiased, unadulterated stupidity. Just when you think republicans have said the craziest thing you’ve ever heard, they surprise you. The chairman of the Texas House Appropriations Committee, Warren Chisum, doesn't believe that the earth revolves around the sun, Yes, you read that right; a grown man who doesn’t believe that the earth revolves around the sun so much that he distributed a memo pitching the website of, evidently, bat-shit crazed wingers, who believe the earth doesn't spin on its axis or revolves around the Sun yet stands still… and just when you think it couldn’t get any better, you then find out that this group believes that Copernicus was part of a Jewish conspiracy to undermine the Old Testament… you can’t write shit like this I’m telling ya. It would be hilarious if it weren’t true…

Applauds: to Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA). Earlier this week she “strongly endorsed binding legislation” that would require the Bush(whacked) Administration to seek congressional authorization even before the thought of military strikes on Iran enters their collective minds… (oops, too late…). Now she’s tied her support for Dubya’s war-funding request into strict standards of training, equipping and resting combat forces. (I think it would be safe to say that Ms. Pelosi has larger balls than her predecessor, Dennis Hastert, ever did…unfortunately, I still have doubts that Congress will be able to stop Bush from doing anything he wants to do… he’s really like an over-aged frat-boy in that regard…)

Heckle: to incredibly unrealistic assumptions and piss-poor analysis. According to documents that have just been releasd, the U.S. Central Command’s original war plan for invading Iraq “postulated in August 2002 that the U.S. would have only 5,000 troops left in Iraq as of December 2006.” (Uh, yeah… I think we’re a little off the mark on that one. 5,000 troops LEFT in Iraq, and here we are, February 2007 and we’re getting ready to send 20,000+ additional troops over there. All you people out there who defended this administration’s war-planning strategy still want to defend it??? Didn’t think so…)

Applaud: to the House Ccommittee on Government Reform for unanimously passing strong new whistle-blower protections, thus ensuring court reviews of whistle blower complaints and extending protection “for the first time to the F.B.I. and to intelligence agencies where wastefulness is draped in secrecy.

Heckle: to hookers at the point… or maybe more appropriately; hookers at the Come-on-I-wanna-lay-ya. In a 25-count indictment disclosed yesterday against Defense contractor Brent Wilkes shows he was able to boondogle a plethora of Pentagon contracts by giving then-Rep. Duke Cunningham, besides cash, a prostitute on August 15, 2003 and, at the Congressman’s request, a different prostitute for the second evening, on August 16th… (First of all; eeeewww… second of all; eeewww again… third; is this what they mean by ‘poleing the electorate’?)

Applaud: to the power of Progressive Blogs. Earlier this week, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) launched a new blog (named The Gavel). Later in the week, a group of conservative House members issued a release claiming Pelosi had “violated copyright and trademark law” by “using pirated content” from C-SPAN, suggesting that “the Speaker bring the gavel down on ‘the Gavel Blog.’” (Naturally, within hours, the group who led the charge learned that their legal analysis was stupid idiotic petty wrong and retracted their complaint… Nice way to show that bi-partisanship you were all crowing about before the session began. And it also makes you wonder what exactly this group of conservatives didn’t want peopl to see. Dumb. Asses.)

Heckle: to lowering your standards. The number of waivers that the Army has granted to recruits with criminal backgrounds has grown 65% in the last three years… (Meaning, once they shoot the enemy, they then take their wallets…)

Applaud: to the end of the Scooter Libby case. Scooter Libby’s defense team has rested. Now, with Libby having decided to not testify himself, it’s over… and all paths lead to the White House. Now we just have to wait to see whose path it leads to…

Heckle: to dumbing down your comments. During the House’s Iraq debate, Rep. Ginny Brown-Waite (R-FL) explained her support for sending tens of thousands of U.S. forces to Iraq with language you would usually only hear in a trailer park:

“In the South, we have a wonderful saying and it goes like this: Get ‘er done. Our soldiers want to get it done and come home, and our President wants the same thing, and this Congress should demand the exact same thing. Let’s get out there and get ‘er done.’

Come on now,that has to be an impeachable offense, right?? Saying something as inane as that on the floor of the House of Representatives… what’s next? You might be a redneck…

Applaud: to more gop dominoes falling. Governor Jim Gibbons (R-NV) is being investigated by the FBI for failing to report gifts from a military contractor that he received while he was a member of Congress… (no word if hookers were involved or not…)

Heckle: to quoting quotes that aren’t actual quotes from the person you’re quoting… During yesterday's House debate on Iraq escalation, Rep. Don Young (R-AK) repeated a misquoted quote from Abraham Lincoln, a “quote” that was used in a Washington Times op-ed piece by Frank Gaffney. Disregarding the fact that the quote was never delivered by Lincoln, a point which Gaffney admits, Young is refusing to retract his statement and using the toddler-like excuse that the paper hasn't printed a correction yet either… (Usually I would use this space to say something akin to; What. A. Tool. But for this one, I prefer; what. A. Child. Grow up, Representative… grow up…)

Applaud: to the news that, for now, North Korea has agreed to nuclear disarmament… does that mean we can stop panicking? Probably not, it is Kim Jong Ill we’re talking about here, and he’s more bi-polar than... well... anyone...

Heckle: to Michelle Malkin. Just because I can…

Applaud: to the American public. A USA Today/Gallup poll finds 63% of Americans want all U.S. troops out of Iraq by the end of 2008…

Heckle: to delusions of grandeur. WaPo Op-Ed columnist David Broder says President Bush is poised for a political comeback… Uh…. Okay… Let me ask you Mr. Broder; what color is the sky in your world?

Applaud: to the Fark poltical headline of the week. “"Leadership" issue plays to Giuliani's strength. "Not sticking your weener in other women while still married" issue plays to his weakness”

Heckle: to Sen. John McCain (R-AZ). Earlier this week he said that he’s extremely concerned about the possibility of a “Tet Offensive” in Iraq that would “switch American public opinion the way that the Tet Offensive did” during Vietnam… (Uh… Senator… more than two-thirds of Americans already oppose the war… what more do you want??)

And finally…

Half-Hearted Applaud: to the House of Representatives for “rebuking” Bush on his troop-escalation plan (246 for, 182 against). Why is this a half-hearted applaud you ask? Because it amounts to less than a slap on the wrist and won’t stop Bush from doing a damn thing. But, I suppose, it’s better than nothing… but not by much. For those of you who want to see it, here’s the text of the resolution:

Disapproving of the decision of the President announced on January 10, 2007, to deploy more than 20,000 additional United States combat troops to Iraq.
Resolved by the House of Representatives (the Senate concurring), That—
(1) Congress and the American people will continue to support and protect the members of the United States Armed Forces who are serving or who have served bravely and honorably in Iraq; and
(2) Congress disapproves of the decision of President George W. Bush announced on January 10, 2007, to deploy more than 20,000 additional United States combat troops to Iraq.

Tomorrow, the Senate votes, and at least four GOP Senators (Smith, Warner, Snowe, and Collins) have said they will switch sides and back the Democratic-led resolution.

All I have, take ‘em as you will and have a good weekend.

The Weekly Rewind

Friday… you know what that means… , it’s porkchop day in the employee cafeteria… that, and it’s time for The Weekly Rewind…

Here ya go:

Applaud: Monday was the birthday of Dr. Martin Luther King… let’s keep his memory and dreams alive forever. So far, $72.9 million has been raised to erect a memorial to Dr. King that is expected to cost $100 million. So if you want to help, donate today.

Heckle: to what seems to be even more cronyism in the Bush(whacked) Administration (… I know, I know, I should be used to it by now from this man) Do you know who Frederick Kagan is? He’s the American Enterprise Scholar who had “the president’s ear” on Iraq and is responsible for crafting the escalation plan. One would think that the person Bush placed responsibility on for crafting a new stratgy for Iraq would have a long military history and experience as a military expert… well, one would think that… and hope that… to bad he isn’t a “military expert” (Yeah… I have great hopes for this plan working…)

Applaud: to giving it back. Iraqi PM Nouri al-Maliki has decided to “take a page out of the Bush administration playbook..” Earlier this week he said that that criticism of his administration from “President” Bush gives the terrorists a “morale boost” and pushes them to make an extra effort. Monkey see… monkey do…

Heckle: to the Bush(whacked) Administration… do you sense a theme here? While House Democrats want to cut student loan interest rates… the administration has “declared its opposition” even though the bill would cut interest rates on some college student loans in half and “would help an estimated 5.5 million students.” (Nice… the White House really does care about the people don’t they? Fuc**** idiots…)

Applaud: to political satirst Art Buchwald… who passed away earlier this week (Thursday). Democrat or republican, Liberal or conservative, it didn’t matter to him, he would skew each side with snark (even before we knew what snark was) and wit. And he did it for over four decades. He will be missed.

Heckle: to the Bush(whacked) Administration. Experts tell us that the Administration is leaving out important details in regards to the Iraq troop “surge” (read: escalation). McClatchy Newspapers: “President Bush and his aides, explaining their reasons for sending more American troops to Iraq, are offering an incomplete, oversimplified and possibly untrue version of events there that raises new questions about the accuracy of the administration’s statements about Iraq.” (I am shocked… shocked to find gambling going on in this establishment…)

Applaud: Senator Barack Obama (D-IL) just created his. Sen. Hillary Clinton (D-NY) is poised to make herself one… former Sen. John Edwards (D-SC) has one… as does Gov Tom Vilsack (D-IA). A few others are considering doing the same… I writing about the ever-popular Presidential Exploratory Committee. This is gearing up to be a croweded and, some say, an historic Presidential campaign. Can’t wait to see how this one plays out. (My opinion can be summed up in two simple words: No. Hillary…. Okay, two more words: No. Kerry.)

Heckle: to the same old, same old. According to the Washington Post, at least half a dozen congressional spouses have jobs as registered lobbyists and several more are connected with lobbying firms. Coincidentally… all reforms that are being made in regards to lobbyists seem to be excluding the aforementioned spouses… but I’m sure there’s no connection to that whatsoever…

Applaud: to Lt. Gen. Karl Eikenberry, the top U.S. commander in Afghanistan, for speaking the truth and ignoring the pressure of the White House. He stated in an interview that Taliban attacks have surged by 200% in December. (Wouldn’t it make more sense to add more troops to Afghanistan, where the terrorist/Al-queda links actually are, then to Iraq? I would think it would, but I guess that’s what happens when I think for myself…)

Heckle: to Commander Cuckoo-Bananas schedule. After six horrific… terrifying… nauseatingly troublesome… civil liberty-erasing… deadly… catastrophic… immoral… sheep-like thinking… years in office, “President” Bush has now spent one full year (or 365 days) at Camp David. The Bushes (The Bushesssses?) left Friday evening for their 116th visit. If you’re asking where his Camp David visits ranks with his Crawford, Texas visits… David is still way on down the line. As of Jan. 1, Bush has spent 405 days in Crawford. Including the days immediately after Hurriance Katrina and immediately after the death of former President Gerald Ford. Bush… a prince of a man… and by prince I mean moron.

Applaud: to Sen. Chuck Hagel (R-NE). He’s joing leading Democrats in introducing a resolution that opposes “President” Bush’s buildup of troops in Iraq. For those of you keeping score, this puts a bipartisan spin on the looming showdown over the war… which include Sen. Christopher Dodd (D-CT) and his cap plan . Especially when you consider that Bush says Congress and the Senate can’t stop his escalation plan… Liberal and conservative Constitutional Law experts disagree... Llllllleeetttssss getttt readddddddyyyyyy toooo rrrruuuummmbbbbbllllleee…

Heckle: to slow-ass comprehension… and evern slower speaking up. Okay, I’ll give him the benefot that the news probably took this long for the concept to comepletely reach his brain , but almost three weeks after the fact, President Bush said the execution of Saddam Hussein “looked like it was kind of a revenge killing.” The hanging of Saddam by the Shiite-led government is also helping accelerate Sunni-Shiite sectarianism across the Middle East.. (and Lord knows that will help defuse the situation…)

Applaud: to shrinking political capital. No, not Bush’s, but Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s. It seems that he is now under pressure from “higher authorities” in Iran to “end his involvement in the country’s nuclear program.” (Good news… but answer me this; why can’t we get the same thing over here?)

Heckle: to Frank Hargrove (R-VA). A day after our nation observed Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, he said that slavery ended nearly 140 years ago and that “black citizens should get over it.” He then went on to say; “Are we going to force the Jews to apologize for killing Christ?” (The crap that oozes out of their mouths just amazes me sometimes…

Applaud: to General Electric, DuPont, and Alcoa, along with about seven additional major companies for banding together, along with a few environmental groups, to call for a “firm nationwide limit on carbon dioxide emissions.” A limit that would lead to reduced emission of “10 to 30%” over the next 15 years… (Excellent… about time some of our larger companies start leading by example. Maybe the gop will finally see the light)

Uber-Heckle: Okay, when I tell you this, don’t panic… on second thought; panic. The Doomsday clock was moved closer to Armageddon this past week. Mass hysteria in 5…4…3…

Applaud: to the fall of the axe… and by axe I mean justice. Ex Congressman Bob Ney (R-OH) has been ordered to serve 30 months in prison for accepting gifts, favors and campaign contributions in exchange for official actions. This makes him the first elected official to be sent to prison in the ongoing investigation of ex-lobbyist Jack “Black Hat” Abramoff'. (Hopefully, and I think I speak for a LOT of people; he wont be the last. Don’t bend over for the soap Bob…)

Heckle: Really???? Rich Little??? Are you fuc**** kidding me???

Applaud: to the Senate (Democrats and republicans) who approved legislation (with a 96 to 2 vote) that would limit the influence of lobbyists, constrict congressional ethics rules and put a stop to spouses of senators from lobbying senators and their staffs. (Nice piece of legislation, but let’s hold off on praising it more until it actually is signed into law…)

Heckle: to Attorney General Alberto “Torture is my Life” Gonzales. Do I really need to give a reason? Sigh… okay; heckle(s) for this, this, this, this aaaaaand this… what. A. Tool.

Heckle: to Vice-President Dick “Dick” Cheney. Why? Because he should be heckled every damn chance we get. Along with “President” Bush, AG Gonzales, Karl Rove, Condi Rice… let’s just throw in every single member of the Bush(whacked) administration and cabinet and be done with it.
That’s all we got, take ‘em as you will.

The Weekly Rewind

Friday is here, whoo-hoo!!

That can mean one thing and one thing only.

Sit down, open your eyes, open your mind and wallow in the crapulence that is… TBWA’s Weekly Rewind.

Applaud: to the best news of this past week… the commencement of the 110th Congress… the commencement of the 110th Democratically controlled Congress… yee-haaaaa and whoo-hoooo!!!!!!!

Applaud: In its first (of many we hope) legislative act, the (Democratically controlled) 110th Congress voted 430-1 yesterday to approve “the broadest ethics and lobbying revision since the Watergate era.” (This is all fine and good, I just hope it works…)

Heckle: to Pat “Bigotry is my Life” Robertson. He’s out wit his annual predictions (who does he think he is, Kreskin? and is saying that God has told him of a terrorist attack on the U.S. that would result in “Mass killing. Late in 2007.” All of this because our nation and society is tolerant of homosexuals. (Sigh… besides a heckle, let me throw out a STFU as well. What a tool)

Applaud: to ignoring bigotry and embracing the bigot. Rep. Keith Ellison (D-MN) introduced himself to Rep. Virgil Goode (R-VA), earlier this week despite the incredibally insensitive, idioitc and racist rants that Goode aimed at Ellison and his Muslim beliefts. (I love this. Not only did it show that Ellison is a bigger man than Goode, it also made Goode look like an even bigger asshat. Way to go Rep. Ellison, keep it up.)

Heckle: to bad news and sorry preparation. Only six out of 75 U.S. cities/metro areas achieved high grades for their emergency agencies’ ability to communicate during a disaster. (Nice… way to keep us safe there guys. Ya think this is what Pat was referring to? Or maybe Pat heard this story on the News and mistook it for God speaking to him… that’s always a possibility, isn’t it?)

Applaud: did I mention that this past week saw the commencement of the 110th Congress… the commencement of the 110th Democratically controlled Congress… yee-haaaaa and whoo-hoooo!!!!!!!

Applaud: to Sen. Barbara Boxer (D-CA), soon to be the chair of the Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works (EPW). She’s already promised that her committee will “scrutinize” the EPA’s approach to… well… to the environment really. (Wow… a EPW committee chair who actually will care about the environment? When’s the last time we had that? Oh, that’s right, the last time we had a Democratically controlled Senate…)

Heckle: “Only six of 75 U.S. metropolitan areas won the highest grades for their emergency agencies’ ability to communicate during a disaster, five years after the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks,” according to a new Dept. of Homeland Security report.

Applaud: to polling data. No, not the one I posted about earlier, but new numbers coming in regarding Dubya’s ever-shrinking approval numbers. CBS shows him at 30% approval... (if he gets below 30, I think we should sell...)

Heckle: to global warming and El Niño, which combined will make 2007 the warmest year on record… (Lovely… last one off the planet is a corpse rotten egg. That self-satisfying ‘I told you so’ you hear is coming from President Gore)

Applaud: to a continuing cleaning up of the mess left by House republicans. Soon to be House workforce chairman George Miller (D-CA) is going to erase a “controversial vestige of the Jack Abramoff era” by raising wages on the Mariana Islands. The islands are a U.S. territory where sweatshop factory conditions, among other things, have been documented but have gone ignored by the U.S. thanks to Abramoff who, in cooperation with his back-pocket conservatives, blocked better working conditions. (See that… get rid of the shyster republicans, elect Democrats, and things start happening… let’s keep it going)

Applaud: have I mentioned that this past week saw the commencement of the 110th Congress… the commencement of the 110th Democratically controlled Congress… yee-haaaaa and whoo-hoooo!!!!!!!

Heckle: to using tactics originally adopted by the tobacco industry (always someone to model yourselves after). ExxonMobil has given $16 million to groups that question global warming in an attempt to “manufacture uncertainty” about climate change. At least that’s what the Union of Concerned Scientists (who I’ve heard throw some wild parties) claims in a recent report. (Nice… very nice… gives you a nice, warm feeling in your heart… and your head… and your legs? Uh-oh… this can’t be good…)

Applaud: to speaking the truth… even if it isn’t viewed as such. Senate Foreign Relations Chairman Joe Biden (D-DE) said earlier this week that he thinks that most of the top officials in the Bush administration have “privately concluded they have lost Iraq and are simply trying to postpone disaster so the next president will ‘be the guy landing helicopters inside the Green Zone, taking people off the roof,’ in a chaotic withdrawal reminiscent of Vietnam.” (Ouch… truth hurts, doesn’t it Dubya? Let me consult the guide here… yes, that statement would qualify as a smackdown… nice job Joe)

Heckle: Chief Justice William Rehnquist was addicted to drugs and had hallucinations after back surgery… wouldn’t that have been a sight to see??

Applaud: to making an example of someone… even though it looks as though he’s being used as a patsy. Energy Secretary Samuel Bodman has fired the head of the department’s nuclear weapons program this past week. Reasons for the firing included a plethora of security failures at national laboratories (including my favorite: a computer device that contained classified documents that was discovered in the home of a former employee during a drug raid… It’s the drug raid portion of the story that makes it art…)

Heckle: to doing things under the radar. A “signing statement” attached to postal legislation, and signed by “President” Bush earlier this week, has opened the door for your government to open mail without so much as a warrant. (And the attack on our civil liberties continues… at least until 1/20/2009…

Applaud: to the continued recovery of Sen. Tim Johnson (D-SD).

Heckle: to the standing ovation that William “The Freezer” Jefferson (D-LA and he who faces an FBI probe into bribery allegations) received from the Congressional Black Caucus. (I don’t think that’s a good way to separate ourselves from the gop there fellas… I’m just sayin’…)

Applaud: to the stepping-down of one-time failed SCOTUS nominee Harriet Miers as White House counsel. She was a tool then… she’s a tool now… and the White House is clearing the decks for troubles ahead I think…

Heckle: to Ann Coulter. Do I really need to give a specific reason? Sigh… okay fine… she called the Democratic party a “vast sleeper cell.” Is that enough of a reason to vilify her? It is. Excellent… let’s get to work people…

Applaud: I think I’ve mentioned this already, but it certainly bears repeating. This past week saw the commencement of the 110th Congress… the commencement of the 110th Democratically controlled Congress… yee-haaaaa and whoo-hoooo!!!!!!!

That’s all I got, take ‘em as you will…